Christian Name: Nikki
Age: 38
Who was your first crush?
I think…my first celebrity crush would be…it’s a tie between Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing, and Keanu Reeves in Bill & Ted. I loved them both!
My first real life major crush was when I was in 6th grade….I was just enamored with an 8th grader…we were both in band.
Who was your first kiss?
I was 12 and was at a sleep over at my cousin’s house….she was two years older than me and invited several friends over….I *think* his name was Michael, but don’t hold me to that.
What are your views on Tinder and other dating apps?
I think Tinder and various other dating apps and sites are just a sign of our technological times. I would use common sense and precautions….but, I could see where they would be fun to use.
What was the best date you ever had?
I’ll be quite honest….and, it may sound incredibly sappy, but the best dates I’ve ever went on were with the man who would become my husband. Psychologically…or maybe Sociology-speaking….what does that reveal? Does it mean my dates were better and more meaningful because I was going on them with the man that I would become my husband?! Anywho, I digress….we would basically go on Day Trips…various, beautiful state parks…great hole-in-the-wall restaurants…and long talks. Look at me…a huge sap.
What was the worst date you ever had?
I went on a date…with a person I had been friends with for several years. He was drunk when I arrived at his house, he then insisted on driving us to a steak house…where he basically drank his dinner and made crude sexual remarks…he then drove us back to his house….drank more…and tried to have sex with me. I used my fantastic personality to charm my way out of that one. He was super classy and literally had huge mirrors on the ceiling of his bedroom. I spoke to him on the phone…one time….about 3 years later….and have never spoken to him again.
What goes through your head when you first realize you have feelings for someone?
I suppose my first emotions/reactions when I realized I had met/was around someone I liked…I was very excited…butterflies in stomach….I was nervous…flirty…I guess my reaction was prompted by the fact that I LIKED them…romantically, not just as a friend. I was anxious to see them as much as possible.
What is the first trait that attracts you to someone?
I think that I’ve always been drawn to intelligence and humor….those are initial traits that I’m looking for….I also looked for kindness. You can tell the true character of a person by the way they treat animals….animals are helpless….if a prospective partner is kind and gentle with animals….that is their true nature…and vice versa.
How would you describe heart break?
Heartbreak….well, I’ve actually been thinking about this one. I think it depends on if you’re doing the breaking or if you’re being broken…I’ve been in both pairs of shoes. If you’re doing the breaking up…..You’ve been unhappy for awhile, so when you do finally “break up”, in a sense, you’re relieved. It’s…upsetting….but, the relief outweighs any major emotional meltdowns. Now, if you’re being heartbroken….then, I felt just devastated. I had knots in my stomach….crying fits….overwhelming sadness, as though someone close to you had died. Every song speaks to you….you’re in a haze….nothing tastes good….nothing makes you happy. There is no light at the end of the tunnel.
What is your break up routine?
My Break-Up Routine….from what I can remember….I was very depressed….I didn’t really eat, I smoked quite a bit more….I would cry at the drop of a hat. I really just wanted to wallow in my grief.
Have you ever been in love?
Yes, of course I’ve been in love….that being said, I have been with the same person for 10 years. I love my husband…a deep, romantic, life-partner love…..but, I can say it’s a different love from when we were dating. It’s not all giddy/butterflies in stomach…it’s just love. I’m not quite sure how to describe it. He’s my family and my husband…he’s my partner in adventures….he’s my rock and always makes me feel taken care of.
Do you think it’s possible to love two people at the same time?
Loving 2 people….American society is so dead-set on monogamy…and that concept is engrained in us from early childhood. I’m just not sure how being polyamorous truly effects people.
What does love mean to you?
Love is…..still finding someone attractive and fun, even after you’ve seen them vomiting into a trash bag while sitting on the toilet. Seriously, I think true love is making a commitment to a person. Saying through words and gestures that you’re THERE FOR THAT PERSON….no matter what. Love is adapting and being flexible…and understanding the other person’s quirks and eccentricities. Love is watching movies that you don’t really like….but the other person is crazy about. I could go on….
What advice do you have for someone who has never been in love?
My advice….be open. You’re usual “type” may not be who you genuinely, truly wind up connecting with. Just keep an open mind….don’t immediately dismiss someone because they’re not what you’ve dated in the past. Your 20’s are a time to date and explore….don’t settle down just because all the people you went to high school with are getting married. Wait….and your time will come. That person may be the one that lasts….and, that person may go…..but, remember….heartbreak won’t kill you.
Nobody puts baillee in the corner 
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